Because Of That Day

You told me that you loved me, you made me feel that my presence was important
you said without me you’d be broken.
& then there came month 26 on that day you left me for someone who was more smoother skin & had more money than. On that day you said maybe we should be just friends. I guess they was just better than & i guess our situation was just for pretend.
Now I’m left broken over contemplating about you, sadly the broken grows when I’m more lost in these thoughts. Pride only allows me to go out when the precipitation is heavy. The rain becomes one with the tears that drip from my eyes it camouflages so no one notices that I’m feeling troubled. At every hour the pain seems to double. They say the pain will soon subside just go outside experience a sunny day, but its like I’m crippled, currently disabled, unable to be as mobile. I need someone by my side to help me reach the outside where the sun shines so bright & the night just never seems to awake. On the inside I’m hurting, i feel that i am the burden. Times like this brings forth the biggest confusion i want love, but then again i feel that i don’t need to be fused with a single soul so i push everyone away because of the pain that i still feel from that day. I’m over here suffering while you’re only out to fuck & mistreat, everyone thinks you’re a good person, but no one knows like I know the secrets you keep lowkey.

My Twitter Accounts: @RetroLove__  & @OfficialRussaw

Our Situation Is Complicated

All these text messages but none equivalent to yours
you been away for a bit, these days you claim to be the busiest
i barely hear from you anymore
Sometimes I think of stopping and knocking at your fucking door
surprise pop ups & text messages like “Hey I miss you”,
but i refuse to because i hate to bug you
and just when we do talk we just never seem to situate the issue
because lately I’d bite my words & beat around the bush as much as possible
pretending to be okay when really I’m not okay.
So up goes the confusion here is the biggest issues
I miss you, but I’d stray away from conversing with you because i don’t want the conversation to turn into devastation
you know how we get.. into arguments that seem to escalade from zero to 50 quick.
It seems that every time I share my feelings you get livid
So I keep my words as brief as possible
because these days I grow aggravated when you misunderstand,
& you get annoyed when i try to make you comprehend
I become very agitated, & frustrated because you’re irritated. Our situation is just the epitome of complication
I love you…. but then again…. we are in a complicated situation that continually grow more out of hand.

Brandon Russaw Twitter: @RetroLove__

A Great Fool

A Great Fool

Its not your fault its mine
I let myself down by thinking you were more
than just the color and quality of your skin
so that ones on me
its just that i got so lost into your fake qualities
over obsessed upon your hazel eyes
until I’ve gotten lost into the depths of your disguise
after many years of dying I’ve lost my color
I still have this blade stuck in my heart
a sharp pain that frequently occurs every fucking moment I think of you
Its torture that never seems to end, it twists, it bends, it breaks the formation of my skin
you played the part so great
you constructed your own stories like a great novelist
oh but don’t worry, your identity to the world will forever remain anonymous
but if you are ever to read this you would know that its directed towards you
its so subliminal
perfectly designed and every fucking line is extremely true
I’m holding no grudges against you
but do you know what you’ve caused?
You’ve caused insecurities within
Now anybody that comes to love me
I’d dog them and push them aside
because of your lines that weren’t actually true
lines that were used against me to get me attached to you
lines and games that clearly has me involved in this cycle
but your happy because you got what you wanted
your only fucking objective was to see me miserable  
Written By Brandon. R 

GoodBye Trimmed Poem

The most hurtful thing to awake in the morning alone
Because
The one that you loved beyond all measures, The one that you were so attached to is no longer laying beside you
Their heart is no longer present 
It freely undulates in the breeze 
Inside I wish it were only a dream
It kills because I know it isn’t
It’s like a sharp pain to the chest
Like a fool I made the wrong move
In this game of chess
I’ve lost my valuables
I’ve Gambled you away
All in one day I’ve gambled you away
I hate it “that day” has arrived, Those hurtful words
But during the midst of this all I’m trying to adjust and just say that I’ll be ok and dissolve the pain
It is so that your absence may never be solved but I’ll be ok
By the grace of God I’ll live to see another day though my day may not be as bright as yesterday by gods grace I’ll be ok 

Written By Brandon. R (OfficalBee) 

Connect with me on Twitter: @RetroLove__

SnapChat: OfficalBee

Poetry – Watch Who You’re Fucking With|Trimmed Version

Infatuated 

The only thing that caught his eye was her body, the stroke of her waist line immediately he acknowledges he wants her so he uses so many corny ass pickup lines just to get in between her thighs he told her many lies and the crazy thing is she believed it because it was all the things that she wanted to hear so within the same day she offers him a shot at a “real relationship”

because the qualification of his appearance was all that she needed, for that she bled all of her feelings out and fell in love within a week. To her, his appearance was life which contributed to her weakness, you know he was the cute type, the type that made most chicks gullible overnight

you see he knew that he had got her the first moment he acquired her visuals ever since that moment he plotted against her he had one goal in mind and that was to break her wall of boundaries down and believe me that task wasn’t easy for him it took time but he didn’t give a fuck he just wanted his nut so he began torturing her mind by feeding her all type of lies in time he grew bored with her and soon began to explore his great departure

after years of being mind fucked she’s completely used up, in a desperate attempt she tries to obtain his attention just for a little bit she opens up and expresses herself but of course he don’t wanna listen to none of it so she breaks down and cry and he replies with some cold shit “you crazy bitch” she grabs a knife and says I’ll show you crazy my nigga you don’t know who you fucking with

long story short she catches him and slices off his penis, like it wasn’t shit and fucks him in his ass with his own dick, now ain’t that some shit. the moral of this story is watch who you fucking with

Thank you all for reading I hope you all enjoyed reading my post. Stay tuned there will be more. Also I do apologize for the foul language I chose to use in my poem, I just believe it shouldn’t be any boundaries when it comes to writing and telling stories. Freedom Expressed! 🙏

Insecurities (Poetry)

I thought to write you a corny little letter

I’d begin this letter with

Roses are red, violets are blue

For you, I’m madly deeply ashamed of you,

wait a second, that’s not true its obvious that I’m over-obsessed with you

the way you talk, the way you walk, the way you move, the way you dance, the way you groove

I’m in love with you but, you’ll never know because I’ll never show

so I’ll forever pretend that I hate you

but fatal truth is I simply can’t live without you it just seems I lack breathing whenever you’re not In my presence  

see my love for you is very strange, extremely deranged filled with anger and often controlled by raged

though I’ve never abused you the thought of you with someone else grows and have a negative effect on my everyday activities these insecurities live within and was birthed by the thought of you with someone else

So I’ll pretend that I hate you, my love for you, I’ll never show

because of these thoughts that always seems to get in the way of our growth, I am submerged in these insecurities or maybe I just need therapy

This is just a short poetic story it is not nor never have been a true situation In my life, but for others, this may have happened if so or if not this writing is just for fun so enjoy.

Also, note this simple quote from me “If You Can’t Trust Em You Shouldn’t Be With Em