GoodBye To You

You said you wanted someone of great quality, But these days great quality in personality is rare to reality. You’d settle for quantities contradicting yourself. You said you were different, but you’re just like everyone else. Love? How could you find it if you can’t define it. And how could you love with no actions behind it. You look for someone to spend a lot of your time with but, at the same time you feel commitment & attachments is a waste of time. So therefore In other words you’re looking for someone to waste a lot of time wasting their time. I am consuming your lies while you are preparing more lies at the end of your pitch fork. I am first demoralized then paralyzed, crippled by every word that you speak. But as a fool I come back for more seconds, doubles & triples because I am a statistic who has fallen hard for your bullshit. I’d submit to your every request, lord know you’re so demanding. The situation bends more depending on the pending of your many tasks & new rules of commandments. And If the image is not as vivid as you planned it I’d have to give an alibi in hopes that you’ll stay because you’re quick to say goodbye & I’m quick to break down & cry. You treat me like my weight has no matter to it, lord why? but everyone has that day they’d wake up & say they’ve had it, enough is enough time to leave you like a classic. On this day you’d say how everyone’s worthless, you’d complain about them not being as flexible & how everyone tends to give up on you, but truthfully you brought this on you. You chased everyone off who was ever nice to you. Cheated & treated like a slave because they really liked you, you’d push them off for someone who’d physically engage in fights with you, someone who doesn’t want to spend a life with you, who’s only interest is engaging in one nights with you. This is my goodbye to you.  Written by Brandon. R  @OfficialRussaw

My Love Suffers

My love suffers & I can’t do anything about it, I’d be modest & wish her well, I’d wish with a snap of a finger her day goes well,
but of course this isn’t a fairytale & I’m not too good on luck all that i can do is lean on hope, but sometimes hope can be the equivalent to a joke as I endure brokenness everyday i am more & more incapable to cope its existence, hope is thinned in our fragile lives when nothing seems to go our way.

I pray to my highest for the best to come our way,
but nothing really changes, everything remains the same
we’re trapped in burden, engulf by sin, going around in circles paying a price that’s over priced.

The most painful thing in life is to watch you in pain,
I’ve watched you cry so much that it has become normal. These days you seem to be more demoralized as age catches up with you,

while your fingers acts as a vine it twists up on you & your voice go dry, & your hair turns gray, these days no one really seems to be truly intrigue in communicating with you all that you have is your mind

& in your mind all that you pray for is your abilities, to be as mobile again, but I guess the price is to high even for the love whose more than any star in the sky,
she’s the universe that gives me the world, & energy
though previously i didn’t act accordingly

I’d walk right by her like she didn’t exist
I’d talk around her like she weren’t present
but they say you don’t know what you have until its nearly gone
& once its gone you’d be in deep regret playing the memories
over & over again like some sad song.

This day as she goes down hill she smiles even while enduring the vilest, she’d give me her last & would only feel free when I’m happy. My love is suffering & I can’t do anything about it.
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Condolences To The Bullshit

My condolences to the bullshit
May the problems rest in peace,
May my grip be retained,
May further attachments with you be
restrained, & may my composure be contained as I regain my brain that I’ve lost
In the process of loving you.
I was just another statistic I suppose, that couldn’t see the obvious, I was lost, blindfolded by all the false “I love you’s” that you’ve composed like a sweet symphony being orchestrated by an Orchestra I fell a victim of manipulation from its glorifying tone. But may the boundaries now surface as I depart from your existence.

Written By Brandon Russaw

A Great Fool

A Great Fool

Its not your fault its mine
I let myself down by thinking you were more
than just the color and quality of your skin
so that ones on me
its just that i got so lost into your fake qualities
over obsessed upon your hazel eyes
until I’ve gotten lost into the depths of your disguise
after many years of dying I’ve lost my color
I still have this blade stuck in my heart
a sharp pain that frequently occurs every fucking moment I think of you
Its torture that never seems to end, it twists, it bends, it breaks the formation of my skin
you played the part so great
you constructed your own stories like a great novelist
oh but don’t worry, your identity to the world will forever remain anonymous
but if you are ever to read this you would know that its directed towards you
its so subliminal
perfectly designed and every fucking line is extremely true
I’m holding no grudges against you
but do you know what you’ve caused?
You’ve caused insecurities within
Now anybody that comes to love me
I’d dog them and push them aside
because of your lines that weren’t actually true
lines that were used against me to get me attached to you
lines and games that clearly has me involved in this cycle
but your happy because you got what you wanted
your only fucking objective was to see me miserable  
Written By Brandon. R 

GoodBye Trimmed Poem

The most hurtful thing to awake in the morning alone
Because
The one that you loved beyond all measures, The one that you were so attached to is no longer laying beside you
Their heart is no longer present 
It freely undulates in the breeze 
Inside I wish it were only a dream
It kills because I know it isn’t
It’s like a sharp pain to the chest
Like a fool I made the wrong move
In this game of chess
I’ve lost my valuables
I’ve Gambled you away
All in one day I’ve gambled you away
I hate it “that day” has arrived, Those hurtful words
But during the midst of this all I’m trying to adjust and just say that I’ll be ok and dissolve the pain
It is so that your absence may never be solved but I’ll be ok
By the grace of God I’ll live to see another day though my day may not be as bright as yesterday by gods grace I’ll be ok 

Written By Brandon. R (OfficalBee) 

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