Our Situation Is Complicated

All these text messages but none equivalent to yours
you been away for a bit, these days you claim to be the busiest
i barely hear from you anymore
Sometimes I think of stopping and knocking at your fucking door
surprise pop ups & text messages like “Hey I miss you”,
but i refuse to because i hate to bug you
and just when we do talk we just never seem to situate the issue
because lately I’d bite my words & beat around the bush as much as possible
pretending to be okay when really I’m not okay.
So up goes the confusion here is the biggest issues
I miss you, but I’d stray away from conversing with you because i don’t want the conversation to turn into devastation
you know how we get.. into arguments that seem to escalade from zero to 50 quick.
It seems that every time I share my feelings you get livid
So I keep my words as brief as possible
because these days I grow aggravated when you misunderstand,
& you get annoyed when i try to make you comprehend
I become very agitated, & frustrated because you’re irritated. Our situation is just the epitome of complication
I love you…. but then again…. we are in a complicated situation that continually grow more out of hand.

Brandon Russaw Twitter: @RetroLove__

A Great Fool

A Great Fool

Its not your fault its mine
I let myself down by thinking you were more
than just the color and quality of your skin
so that ones on me
its just that i got so lost into your fake qualities
over obsessed upon your hazel eyes
until I’ve gotten lost into the depths of your disguise
after many years of dying I’ve lost my color
I still have this blade stuck in my heart
a sharp pain that frequently occurs every fucking moment I think of you
Its torture that never seems to end, it twists, it bends, it breaks the formation of my skin
you played the part so great
you constructed your own stories like a great novelist
oh but don’t worry, your identity to the world will forever remain anonymous
but if you are ever to read this you would know that its directed towards you
its so subliminal
perfectly designed and every fucking line is extremely true
I’m holding no grudges against you
but do you know what you’ve caused?
You’ve caused insecurities within
Now anybody that comes to love me
I’d dog them and push them aside
because of your lines that weren’t actually true
lines that were used against me to get me attached to you
lines and games that clearly has me involved in this cycle
but your happy because you got what you wanted
your only fucking objective was to see me miserable  
Written By Brandon. R 

Insecurities Trimmed Poem

Insecurities

When you love someone so much
But you doubt the next day
All that goes through your mind is that everyone has “their day” 
every time you speak with that person you think to yourself “this is that day”
With little to say you grow angry
As you are very perplexed and curious on why your gut keeps telling you to move on to the next
So you put this person up to some foolish test, and the answers from it shall bring out the very best, good or bad if bad you publicly announce that you’re not sad, but truthfully you’re broken inside, it is because of pride you keep that inside, you claim to aim high but truthfully you’re stuck, those latches of attachments are wrapped around you like vise grips they won’t ease up, it weighs you down in quicksand, it tears your spirit apart it devours your heart.
You’re lost into the wrong estimation
The situation was simply a miscalculation
Or is it? You’re covered in filth, simply you lay in gilt because you deeply know that if your speculations are actually wrong you’d lose that person all because you felt that “this was that day” but needless to say this is that day, finally You’ll say goodbye, wish them luck and go your separate way. *Insecurities*

Written By Brandon. R (OfficalBee) 

Connect with me on Twitter: @RetroLove__

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